What do you want?
Jesus turned around and saw they were following him and asked, “What do you want?” They responded, “Rabbi, where are you staying?” Jesus answered, “Come and discover for yourselves.” John 1:38-39
Jesus asked, “What do you want or what do you want in following me?”
This question cuts deep to the motive of the heart. It’s a question every proclaimed follower of Jesus should ask themselves. What do we want in following Jesus? Do we simply want salvation? Do we seek a ministry platform? Answers to prayers? Healing? Rescue from difficulties?
Or do we simply want Him… all of Him.. the real Him.. the fullness of Him? Would we trade in all of the dreams or pleasures this world has to offer just to be with him and know his heart?
The disciples response showed the true intent of their heart. “Where are you staying?”
Rewind to the garden after the fall.. Yahweh shows up for the walk but Adam is hiding. Yahweh asks “Adam where are you?” Yahweh knew where Adam was. The question was for Adam not Yahweh.
Beautifully we see this question echoing through time into this moment where Andrew asks the question back to Jesus “Rabbi, where are you staying?” I believe this response was an echo from the heart of the Father in the garden, signaling the restoration of the separation and all that was lost.
“Come and see for yourself.” We have been given the most incredible invitation to come and see for ourselves who Jesus truly is. Not just what we have heard or been taught by others but to see and experience the real Jesus. His true heart and nature. His love is like no other.
I remember sitting on my bed in middle school.. with my Bible and heart open I asked The Lord to show me the real Jesus. Coming from so many different churches and theological influences I craved truth. I believed like a child that His heart was to show me who He was and that is exactly what happened. Not overnight but day after day, failure after failure, pain after pain, encounter after encounter He led me to His chest and I haven’t left.
I am often asked the question “How did you get to this healing?”
Healing was not ever my target. His heart was my aim and in discovering His heart I discovered his perspective.. in discovering his perspective I found life and in finding life.. healing is a natural outcome.
Not that I have full understanding or have mastered anything.. but what I do know is there are no limits or restrictions on a heart fully surrendered and seeking Him and nothing else.
His love changed my life. His love healed my broken heart. His love is my peace. His love healed my body from disease. His love is LIFE. Not fragile life that I have to try to cling to.. real life that cannot ever be taken away. His love is the burning tears in my eyes that I refuse to withhold from him. They hold memory of every moment of his faithfulness.
When I feel myself beginning to get distracted by all of the things… pulling trying to grab my gaze… I often hear “What do you want in following me?” And suddenly these hands fling open wide and my heart cries out “YOU! JUST YOU!”
That is home.